The prompt for Week 2 of Journal52 was “Just Be”.
My first thought was mindfulness meditation, a practice I’ve been working on since Autumn 2013 or so. It’s been a very positive influence on increasing my patience, but also my ability to be present during both joyous and very painful moments. It was such a gift to be mindfully and peacefully present during my grandfather’s death, watching every breath of both of ours so closely. It definitely helped me deal with the pain of labor, and I went 20 hours with no pain medicine, after which I took a short epidural nap and then got up & pushed for 5 hours straight, for a total of a 32-hour labor. But on the flip side of those things, when people throw out that old chestnut, “Enjoy every moment”, I can honestly say I’m able to come close. And maybe not enjoying, but BEING.
This is my self-portrait. Maybe a little harsh, or maybe I’m not such a good draw-er yet. But honestly, I really like it. I think it accurately captures some of my most prominent features, the ones that most people might think are put-downs, but that I like about myself (most of the time)–my scraggly hair with ever-present winter hat, the dark circles under my eyes that have been there since I was a tiny baby, my father’s thick eyebrows and my mother’s thick lips.
I also really like how the colors came out. I started with a fairly random background idea–blue watercolor with acrylic yellow dashes. I’ve been listening to/learning about George Harrison recently, and was singing the Hare Krishna chart while I was drawing. When I finished, I realized I’d be Krishna blue, which is kinda cool.
And my Journal52 is already getting kinda puffy & juicy. Yay!